Why not start a new series on how my life is going? Not that you care but I feel like I owe you all an explanation on why I haven't been posting much, only reviews, that to be honest those were already scheduled since summer.
I've been in a reading slump for the past month, I don't feel like reading at all, not even pick up a book, I'm currently reading one again, trying to get out of it, it's hard, but I'm trying, I already DNF'ed two books during that slump, which doesn't help.
Anxiety has been killing me, not literally, but with university work and teachers always telling you everything is wrong, do it again, I don't like that idea, elaborate in a different way... that makes me stressed, if I'm stressed then I don't eat or sleep, if I don't do any of those then anxiety kicks in and does the job of finishing me, to a point where I don't even want to leave the house, only for school, and even that I missed a few times or arrived later because I'm just done.
I'm an art student, so some stuff I need to have a plan before doing it, and I need ideas first, the teacher wants to speed the creation process to a point where I don't like my idea at all and I'm just doing it because I have to, normally that doesn't work well for me, why? the stress, the anxiety, the panic attacks.
Friends asked me if I wanted to go out with them, but I'm so out of energy that not even that I want to do, and trust me, if the day comes that I don't even want to go to the gym, which is the only place that I still want to go because I get my mind off of things and life, take some of the stress out, if that day comes... I don't know how to get back to a "normal" life, I'm already trying to go back to before all of this, making me eat and sleep. Today I had a headache for the entire day because I was just tired of everything, but I still got out of bed and went to school...
So yeah, long text just to explain that even though I've not been posting the tags and TBR's and wrap-ups, etc, I'm still trying to come back and write, but I need to be sure that I'm better enough for that, I want to enjoy doing this, I love writing posts on books, but if I don't even want to pick up a book then why would I write? Those are my thoughts right now and I don't want them...
Sorry for the long text, actually felt like writing, sorry if the text doesn't make sense, I don't even think I'll re-read it so I won't be able to change my mind and delete the whole thing.
If you're struggling with anxiety and uni and stress feel free to just write a long text, or small, if you need to vent, maybe someone will be able to help you (I don't promise I will) or just write something encouraging for other people that come here and need something positive, because I also could use that right now...
Love you and hopefully see you soon in more posts other than reviews.
Well… I kinda know what you fell, it’s difficult to focus when is there so much pressure, sometimes I like to just stay with close eyes, listening to a relax music and just leave my mind fly, without thinking about problems, works, and everything, just thinking about happy things, that makes me happy. I know it’s difficult, but you must take your time too, don’t push yourself, you can take your time and start again. Think about yourself too, do something that you like to do and that make you happy, stay with friends or watch movies, or go in a walk, don’t think only about university, you have your life too. Sometimes is refreshing to break the routine that we have on our days, go out and do something different.
ReplyDeleteI’m sure you’re not alone, you can always count on your family and friends. Just breath and relax… Is everything going to be all right :) you will see. Hope you get better.